Everyday I walk outside and see people. People mowing their lawn, taking their children to school, officers protecting those people from other people, and all of these people are physically present, they can be touched, heard, felt, smelled, whatever. They are the people that make up the world around me, and it is their actions that at many times determine the outcome of my day, mood, and philosophy. Or is it so? Sometimes, no most of the time, these people have no impact on me. Their feelings and needs I understand, or at least I think I understand, but the inevitable truth is that the importance of their feelings are at many times nothing to me. And for this reason maybe they bring their life, relationship, financial, etc, problems towards me, because I believe when one has no true connection with another the advice that is given is most often unbiased, to the point, and in the end usually helpful. But when the individual coming towards you is one with which you are connected beyond just that of just a physical presence, the mind wanders. You think of what to say, and how to say it..when to say it, and before saying it you want the words coming out to be of higher importance then anyone else’s. But what if this person does not even hold a physical presence with you, and what if they haven’t ever occupied the space around you, but yet they are the prime motive behind your thoughts, mood, and actions. The person’s every word and thought holds such vital importance that to keep your own thoughts and actions focused you must keep that person…’content?’. And when the person isn’t at his or her home I feel an emptiness inside of me. My humor, mood, and willingness to work decline, and the only thing I can think of, or imagine, is of what that person is doing at the moment, and when he or she will return, and what is weird is that they have never been physically present in the first place, so their displacement from point A to B shouldn’t make a difference in my mindset because it has not affected me in any known way, but it still does. The person’s mental presence holds a greater presence that any physical one ever has upon me. The connection is so strong that all others are kept at a distance.

Unedited. Unrevised writing.

Hmm.. I know the above sounds weird and probably makes no sense at all but their is great signficance behind it, and I just had to let out a flow of thought onto the blog.

I’m still sane.